A problem that many girls have is that they don’t know how to chat with boys after adding them on WeChat.
If the conversation is too deep, you are afraid of exposing your needs in advance and become a clown. If the conversation is too shallow, there is no way to advance the relationship.
What do you eat every day? What are you doing? We’ve already talked about zodiac signs, movie hobbies. Do you want to advance the depth of your chat, but don’t know what to do?
If you feel this way when chatting with boys, it means that your chat has entered the "awkward period". There are three signs that the chat has entered an awkward period:
There is no way to answer the call. Some superficial information has already been discussed. When you chat, you only exchange information without paying attention to it. As a result, you are unable to talk about more in-depth topics, so you have the embarrassing situation of having nothing to say.
For example, a man and woman were on a blind date, and they had a good chat on the first night. They talked about their family situation, their favorite colors, their favorite foods, and their zodiac signs and blood types. But on the third day, the two fell into silence because they didn’t know what to say.
You can only talk about fixed topics. If it goes beyond a certain range, you will have nothing to say.
For example, my fan Xiaobai, in order to chat with the boy he likes, worked hard to practice his game playing skills, and finally became a golden assistant. In order to catch up with this boy, Xiaobai played games with the boy from 9pm until 3am.
But the strange thing is that every time a boy asks her to play games, he only talks to her. Other times when she chats with boys, they tend to ignore her or just give a perfunctory reply without replying.
Xiaobai felt particularly embarrassed, feeling like he had become a boy’s play partner.
One time, Xiaobai mustered up the courage to say to the boy: "The weather is so nice today, will you come out to play?" The boy immediately replied with three words: "Play, sign up." This made Xiaobai dumbfounded, and he played with the boy again. Had an afternoon game.
If you can only get close to this boy because of a certain fixed field such as gaming or work, but then your chats will always be within this scope and no one can go further. That also means that you have reached the awkward stage of chatting.
Chat log.
For example, a girl complained to me, saying that the content of her conversations with boys was very clear. Every day, boys would ask, "What do you want to eat good morning and good night?" She always answered these questions.
Other than these questions, boys don’t ask anything, and she won’t take the initiative to talk to boys. What is the relationship between two people? It seems like nothing. Neither of them would take the initiative to move forward with the relationship.
The two of them just chatted without any embarrassment. How much they liked each other could not be seen from the chat records. It feels more like two people contacting each other with the idea of giving it a try. You are useless to me, and I am also useless to you. Let’s just talk. It’s better to have someone we’re in contact with than not.
The three phenomena just mentioned are the awkward periods in chatting. You already feel that chatting like this is awkward, but you don’t know how to solve it. The progress of the two of you seems to be stuck here.
If you want to solve the problem of increasingly awkward chats, you must first do the following:
Try to guide the other person to expose themselves
For example, when you are chatting, you ask the other person what they like to eat and what their favorite color is? Then he asked the other person what his blood type and zodiac sign were? This is a kind of self-disclosure. The more information the other party discloses to you, the stronger the trust between you.
If you feel that the other person is not paying attention when you are chatting, it means that the scope of your self-exposure is too small.
So how do you increase the other person’s level of self-disclosure? The simplest trick is to ask open-ended questions rather than closed-ended questions.
For example, don’t ask: “Do you like this movie?”
Instead, ask: "What do you think of this movie?" and then expand the chat information based on the other party’s answer.
Information Depth
In fact, when the other party tells you their zodiac sign, blood type, and what kind of food they like to eat, there are so many chat signals that you can mine. The key is whether you can talk.
Let me tell you a very basic information now.
The content of the chat is generally divided into three levels.
The first layer is surface information: just like our name, gender, zodiac sign, age, hobbies, work, and favorite movies. These are our surface information and the basic information for us to understand each other.
The second layer is middle-level information: middle-level information includes our memories, our prospects for the future, and our emotions. When we talk to this level, we are already good friends, or have an ambiguous relationship.
When you are chatting about surface information, you have to find ways to expand into middle-level information. Only in this way will your chat gradually gain depth. Otherwise, the day you finish chatting about surface information, you will definitely enter an awkward period of chatting.
The third level is deep information: little secrets, feelings, memories, experiences, understandings, awareness, etc. are what we call deep information. Under normal circumstances, when the conversation reaches this level, you have already lost your mind.
But be careful when chatting about in-depth information. It does not ask you to explore all the privacy of the other party, nor does it ask you to report all the privacy to the other party. There is a difference between deep information and the deepest secrets of the heart. If you feel you don’t want to say something, you don’t have to say it.
Similarly, if there are some things that the other party really doesn’t want to talk about, you don’t want to delve into them. You still have to leave some room for each other. **
I want to say here that in fact, by the time ordinary couples talk about mid-level information, they already know each other relatively well. But according to our survey, some couples have only talked about some deep information, and only a very small number of true soul mates have talked about more deep information.
After understanding this basic, if you also want to chat from surface information to mid-level information, and also want to learn more techniques to make the other party love you more and make you happier, don’t hesitate any more and quickly add the emotional analyst’s WeChat below. !
Let the teacher tailor a charm improvement plan for you, from the overall strategic layout to how to send each WeChat message, the teacher can help you figure it out: